List of wedding planning random thoughts in no particular order. These are my thoughts alone and every bride and every wedding is different. Just some honest reflection that will hopefully benefit some bride like me (not high strung, hung on details or overly sentimental).
Don't be pressured to conform to a certain theme. Just because everyone is into country and boho weddings right now doesn't mean that is the only way to make it look awesome. I kind of got sick looking at pinterest weddings with all of the mason jars and chalkboards. Just not my thing.
Ditch the tacky engagement photos (unless you are into that). I am not a fan of writing on the bottom of shoes, holding signs of any kind, using scrabble pieces or blocks to spell things and especially making a heart with your hands. You can do better than that! Be creative!
Don't bother looking at those "Who pays for what" charts. Sometimes family circumstance requires something to be less traditional. We didn't want our bridal party to be pressured financially for being in our wedding so we payed for their attire because we could afford it. We tried to not rely on our families for too much but payed as much as we possibly could.
Ugh Pinterest. I would just ditch it in retrospect. Too much of a time-suck.
Don't try and DIY everything...Let me just be honest...half of the DIY wedding stuff is very obviously handmade and I'm just not into tacky looking things. Sometimes it is worth paying the little bit of extra money instead of working on something for hours and only having it look half as good as a purchased thing. Professionals are professionals for a reason.
Buy your invitations at Costco! Simple elegant card for cheap.
Have people RSVP online. This saves paying for the RSVP card. If people can't figure it out then they can call and tell a family member that they are coming.
We like the freedom of unassigned seating. We did it this way so people could mingle and sit with whomever they wanted.
Programs didn't happen for us and we didn't even miss them.
We didn't do a Father/Daughter or Mother/Son dance. We were both like..um NO, let's just make it about us. We loved that it was just a special time for us.
Really spend some time with your pastor inputting on content for the ceremony. We wanted a traditional ceremony and loved getting time to really help make it our own.
Use Excel to create an address matrix for the invite list. Way easier than having everything handwritten and you will need it all again for thank-you cards.
Ditch the party favors! Nobody really cares about the monogrammed mints or the baggie of something sitting on their plates. You will end up with them on the venue floor and left on the table to get thrown away.
Pick your wedding colors based on how easy you can find things that work with them. If you pick some obnoxious or specialized color you will spend way more on everything. If you do pick an obnoxious color, at least don't put it on the cake...odd colors don't look great on the teeth/tongue for pictures.
Don't spend a load of money on a gift for your soon to be spouse before the wedding. Use the money to treat yourself to a dinner or something else on the honeymoon.
If you find the dress after visiting store number 1, do not proceed to go to other stores and compare. Trust your gut and get the dress that made you happy. I had a miserable experience at store number 3 because I had already found my dress (on sale :) ) at store number 2 and I don't like wasting time after I have made up my mind. Also I would recommend avoiding David's Bridal completely and just going to boutiques not chains (They have more unique dresses and care for you more personally).
Don't get hung up on everything being matching. Things can be coordinating and be alot cheaper than perfectly matching.
Pay well for the things that will be seen in the pictures (those will last forever). Ditch paying more for things that will not matter in a few years.
Hire my awesome family to make food for the wedding because everyone thought it was catered. Just kidding, but do consider ditching the full meal and save money by serving hors d'oeuvres instead. It is classy elegant food and cheaper than a full meal.
If decorations don't matter to you then don't shell out hundreds on them! Pay for the things that matter to you. For me those things were honeymoon, photos, dress cake and food (in that order).
Come up with a photography shotlist well in advance and have your photographer stick to it! This ensures that during the craziness of the day that everything is captured. Also get as many shots done before the wedding as possible.
If photos matter to you then make sure you are choosing locations that work the best for the lighting and don't expect your photographer to perform miracles. I could write a whole post on this as a photographer....
Pay for someone to do makeup and hair. My skin never looked so flawless.
Ditch the bachelorette party the night before the wedding. I just enjoyed a quiet dinner and it was fabulous. There is no need for a last hurrah party in my opinion, this can only cause problems.
Get a workout in the day before the wedding even if it is a quickie. Helps get out some of the nerves and makes your muscles feel tight and awesome in your dress the next morning.
Eat. The night before the wedding, the week before the wedding, the day of the wedding. Just eat.
Journal your thoughts the night before the wedding, you will thank yourself later. I am a consistent journal person and have been for years but even if you are not, these are the kind of things you want to read and relive someday.
Don't be late. I hate going to weddings where the wedding starts 30 minutes late. Stick to your schedule!
Stay local the night of the wedding and don't try to fly/drive out to the honeymoon destination that night. Way more relaxed that way.
Get someone else to help handle returning of rented tuxes and other rental items, you should not worry about that while honeymooning.
Don't use a flower girl and ring bearer if you don't want to! We didn't have any particularly close kids to us so we didn't bother.
The bridesmaids and groomsman do not have to equal out in number. We had a total of 4 groomsmen and 3 bridesmaids and the matching number doesn't even matter! It just meant Chris has more friends than me haha!
Sign the wedding certificate immediately after the ceremony (you don't want to forget this part), that way your pastor can leave if he wants to and you you won't have to hunt people down to do it later.
Sell all of your wedding stuff post-wedding if you aren't sentimental (ME), you can make a lot of money and get rid of the clutter fast.
Wash your car quickly after the wedding if people painted on your windows. People will honk and yell at you when driving as a congratulations thing but in our case we waited a couple weeks (after the honeymoon and moving craziness) and then spent time confused as to why all these rude people were honking at us.
And most of all, remember that the wedding is a day and the marriage is a lifetime. Don't do anything for a day that would hurt your lifetime. The wedding day is about the two of you and as much as people say "it's your day" it can sometimes feel like not yours as the planning progresses. Make it yours and and your spouses day. Consult about everything and be on the same page as a team so that every decision is collective and final. Let the little things go and try not to stress out because after a couple hours you will be driving away hand in hand and will realize that you just closed a chapter and opened a new one all in one moment. It's a wonderful rush.
Wife | Homemaker | Foodie | Garage Saler | Thrift Shopper | Personal Chef (For my Husband) | Lover of Family | Creative Mind - This is my space to enjoy and appreciate the beauty of my life outside my job as a photographer.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Friday, January 23, 2015
Portland Burger Tour - Gruner
According to the Oregonian top 10 list, Gruner took the number 1 spot in Portland for best burger. After eating there last night, I think we all may have to agree.
Gruner is a very small restaurant and the burger is only served in the bar area. We were lucky to get in to a table pretty quickly since it was a Thursday evening. We all ordered the burgers cooked medium and we also each split a side of the Fried Smashed Fingerling Potatoes. The burgers were just incredible. The meat was very tender and my favorite part was the multiple levels of flavor developed in the burger. They have amazing house made pickles and pickled onions, fontina cheese, arugula, aioli and a really hearty crisp bun. It a messy amazing piece of heaven burger. We were all in agreement (which is a shocker!!) that this burger is indeed the best we have tried so far, followed very closely by Paley's Place.
Our ratings below -
Kendra's Ratings
Burger - 9.5
Environment - 8
Side - 9
"Amazing burger and side, the best yet!"
Chris' Ratings
Burger - 9
Environment - 7
Side - 7
Ron's Ratings
Burger - 9
Environment - 7.5
Side - 9
Lisa's Ratings
Burger - 9
Environment - 8
Side - 8
Gruner is a very small restaurant and the burger is only served in the bar area. We were lucky to get in to a table pretty quickly since it was a Thursday evening. We all ordered the burgers cooked medium and we also each split a side of the Fried Smashed Fingerling Potatoes. The burgers were just incredible. The meat was very tender and my favorite part was the multiple levels of flavor developed in the burger. They have amazing house made pickles and pickled onions, fontina cheese, arugula, aioli and a really hearty crisp bun. It a messy amazing piece of heaven burger. We were all in agreement (which is a shocker!!) that this burger is indeed the best we have tried so far, followed very closely by Paley's Place.
Burger - 9.5
Environment - 8
Side - 9
"Amazing burger and side, the best yet!"
Burger - 9
Environment - 7
Side - 7
Burger - 9
Environment - 7.5
Side - 9
Burger - 9
Environment - 8
Side - 8
Portland Burger Tour - Lardo
Oh Lardo, you do not fail to live up to your name. This place was all about the meat. Our burgers had double patties plus porkstrami and were so large it was a real squeeze for my tiny mouth. The burger was really good but didn't really have any stand-out spices or flavors that caught my attention. We all walked/waddled away very full. My favorite part about Lardo was their side - Parmesan and Herb Crusted Fries. Oh my gosh...I have never had a fry like this in my life. They bring you a plate of fries that visibly are coated with parmesan and just so rich with herb flavor. They are so good by themselves that is is almost a crime to dip them in ketchup. We were all in agreement that this was one of the best and most interesting plates of fries we have eaten. I am honestly dying to go back and try a sandwich there because every single one look incredible.
Our ratings are below!
Kendra's Ratings
Burger - 6
Environment - 6
Side - 8.7
"Best fries ever..."
Chris' Ratings
Burger - 8
Environment - 7
Side - 7
Ron's Ratings
Burger - 7
Environment - 7
Side -9
Lisa's Ratings
Burger - 7
Environment - 7.2
Side - 8.5
Burger - 6
Environment - 6
Side - 8.7
"Best fries ever..."
Burger - 8
Environment - 7
Side - 7
Burger - 7
Environment - 7
Side -9
Burger - 7
Environment - 7.2
Side - 8.5
Thursday, January 8, 2015
My Confidence
Over the last few weeks I have been reading a book called "The Confidence Code" by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman. The premise of the book is discussing how women lack confidence and miss out on many opportunities to men because of their lack of self-assurance and of course teaching on how to gain confidence. It has been a very interesting read for me and has stretched me to really think hard about the concepts of feminism and confidence.
First off, if you don't know it already - I am not a feminist. I don't believe that I am undervalued or that I miss opportunities because I am a woman. I choose to be subservient in my household to my husband. I understand that I have certain physical limitations and tendencies because I am a woman. That being said, I am very competitive in everything I do. I have a good job in a mostly male-dominated corporate manufacturing environment, I am competitive in sports on co-ed teams and I own my own business. I have never felt that I couldn't do something just because I am a woman. In all my time in these fields it has been skills based. If you are hard-working and driven then you get places in life, if you are lazy then you won't. You will sit on the bench on any sports team if you aren't good at it, it really doesn't matter at if you are a man or a woman. If the goal is winning then a good coach/boss will choose the players/people that are best equipped to lead and contribute. If I fail I don't need/want to use the cop-out that it is because I am a woman, no. I fail because I didn't work hard enough or maybe I wasn't as qualified.
I also don't think it is fair to say that women alone struggle with the issues of confidence and finding value in themselves. I think this is an issue of being human. More than anything I think that lack of confidence comes from not understanding our value in God's eyes. As I read this book I realized more and more that self-assured confidence is just a front that people put on because true genuine confidence can come from nowhere but God. I am confident and I feel like I could do pretty much anything I set my mind to but it isn't because I am self-assured. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. This whole situation sent me into a word study in the bible to really find where confidence comes from. And my list isn't nearly as extensive as it could be but it was enough to really back up my point and to assure me that I am correct in my thoughts on this subject. Below are a few verses from the bible that really illustrate what true confidence can look like for us -
What can mere mortals do to me?”
or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
26 for the Lord will be at your side
and will keep your foot from being snared.
whose confidence is in him.
8 They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.”
These, to me, are verses that bring confidence. No amount of self-assurance can give us what these verses give. God is not addressing gender with these verses about confidence. This confidence is available to men and women. God has a plan, a better one then we could ever come up with for our careers, family and living situation. Through God we have peace and we don't need to worry about the future. God will never leave us. With God we don't need to have trust issues because he has never broken our trust, He keeps his promises to us. He values us and He cares about us. Our competence comes from God, our skills and abilities are from Him. Could He not also help us use our skills and abilities to their full potential since He gave them to us? The verse in Jeremiah says, "Blessed are those who put their trust in the Lord and whose confidence is in Him". The verse doesn't say blessed are those who are self-assured.
This begs the question, why do Christians struggle with confidence and self-worth? Because we start to long for the approval of other flawed humans rather than the approval of the Lord who made us. This is not an easily answered question, nor one to be taken lightly, because so many people deal with this issue on confidence.
Below are the dictionary definitions of confident and self-assured -
The very definition of "confident" is one of being introspective and trusting in yourself. I challenge you today to look at confidence with God as the center rather than ourselves. This takes the pressure off of you to assure yourself into a state of confidence. All we have to do is trust that God is going to do what he says he will do. He didn't lead you to a certain point in life to abandon you and make you figure out the rest on your own. No. Most of the time that we find ourselves stressed and worried about the future is because we have taken things off of God's plate and put them on our own when we are not capable of handling it. I have been so incredibly stressed and anxious the last few weeks and I realized it is because I am trying to clutch the future with white knuckles and guide it the way I want it to go. I have spent days journaling just outlining what I wanted in life and wracking my brain as to how I can achieve it all. How can I be 100% at work, at my business and as a wife and someday as a mother? How can I do it all? How can I manage everything? How can I keep what I want and get rid of what I don't want? How can we make it financially? How can I manage all of the risk? I, I, I, I, I is the common denominator in these questions. I let it go this week. I could not physically or emotionally handle trying to deal with everything, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. And it is absolutely incredible how much peace I have now after giving my problems to God when not a thing has changed about my situation. It is amazing how confident and sure of the future I feel when I still don't know more than I knew last week. But God has been teaching me a lesson in confidence. God has really clearly met me and showed me this week that he has brought me to this place in my life for a very specific reason. He has given me hope that all of my dreams will be fulfilled in His perfect way and that I need to continue to work hard to the best of my abilities for right now.
This peace is available to those who are willing to let go and give their futures to God. The closer you get to Him the more confident you feel. It is truly amazing and a piece of wisdom I couldn't not share because I know many people who struggle with this.
Lastly more as just a funny comparison, here are some photos of confidence vs confidence in God. They really give a great visual illustration for this discussion.
Confident -
Confident in God -
First off, if you don't know it already - I am not a feminist. I don't believe that I am undervalued or that I miss opportunities because I am a woman. I choose to be subservient in my household to my husband. I understand that I have certain physical limitations and tendencies because I am a woman. That being said, I am very competitive in everything I do. I have a good job in a mostly male-dominated corporate manufacturing environment, I am competitive in sports on co-ed teams and I own my own business. I have never felt that I couldn't do something just because I am a woman. In all my time in these fields it has been skills based. If you are hard-working and driven then you get places in life, if you are lazy then you won't. You will sit on the bench on any sports team if you aren't good at it, it really doesn't matter at if you are a man or a woman. If the goal is winning then a good coach/boss will choose the players/people that are best equipped to lead and contribute. If I fail I don't need/want to use the cop-out that it is because I am a woman, no. I fail because I didn't work hard enough or maybe I wasn't as qualified.
I also don't think it is fair to say that women alone struggle with the issues of confidence and finding value in themselves. I think this is an issue of being human. More than anything I think that lack of confidence comes from not understanding our value in God's eyes. As I read this book I realized more and more that self-assured confidence is just a front that people put on because true genuine confidence can come from nowhere but God. I am confident and I feel like I could do pretty much anything I set my mind to but it isn't because I am self-assured. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. This whole situation sent me into a word study in the bible to really find where confidence comes from. And my list isn't nearly as extensive as it could be but it was enough to really back up my point and to assure me that I am correct in my thoughts on this subject. Below are a few verses from the bible that really illustrate what true confidence can look like for us -
Hebrews 13:5-6 New International Version (NIV)
5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
“Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you.”
never will I forsake you.”
6 So we say with confidence,
“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.What can mere mortals do to me?”
2 Chronicles 32:8 New International Version (NIV)
8 With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the Lord our God to help us and to fight our battles.” And the people gained confidence from what Hezekiah the king of Judah said.
Proverbs 3:25-26 New International Version (NIV)
25 Have no fear of sudden disasteror of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
26 for the Lord will be at your side
and will keep your foot from being snared.
Isaiah 32:17 New International Version (NIV)
17 The fruit of that righteousness will be peace;
its effect will be quietness and confidence forever.
its effect will be quietness and confidence forever.
Jeremiah 17:7-8 New International Version (NIV)
7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,whose confidence is in him.
8 They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.”
2 Corinthians 3:4-5 New International Version (NIV)
4 Such confidence we have through Christ before God. 5 Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.
1 John 5:14New International Version (NIV)
14 This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.
Jeremiah 29:11-14New International Version (NIV)
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you,” declares the Lord.These, to me, are verses that bring confidence. No amount of self-assurance can give us what these verses give. God is not addressing gender with these verses about confidence. This confidence is available to men and women. God has a plan, a better one then we could ever come up with for our careers, family and living situation. Through God we have peace and we don't need to worry about the future. God will never leave us. With God we don't need to have trust issues because he has never broken our trust, He keeps his promises to us. He values us and He cares about us. Our competence comes from God, our skills and abilities are from Him. Could He not also help us use our skills and abilities to their full potential since He gave them to us? The verse in Jeremiah says, "Blessed are those who put their trust in the Lord and whose confidence is in Him". The verse doesn't say blessed are those who are self-assured.
This begs the question, why do Christians struggle with confidence and self-worth? Because we start to long for the approval of other flawed humans rather than the approval of the Lord who made us. This is not an easily answered question, nor one to be taken lightly, because so many people deal with this issue on confidence.
Below are the dictionary definitions of confident and self-assured -
con·fi·dent
ˈkänfədənt/
adjective
adjective: confident
1.
feeling or showing confidence in oneself; self-assured.
"she was a confident, outgoing girl"
| synonyms: | self-assured, assured, self-confident, positive, assertive, self-possessed, self-reliant, poised; More |
self-as·sured
adjective
adjective: self-assured
confident in one's own abilities or character.
"a self-assured 16-year-old"
| synonyms: | self-confident, confident, assertive, assured, authoritative, commanding, self-reliant, self-possessed, poised |
The very definition of "confident" is one of being introspective and trusting in yourself. I challenge you today to look at confidence with God as the center rather than ourselves. This takes the pressure off of you to assure yourself into a state of confidence. All we have to do is trust that God is going to do what he says he will do. He didn't lead you to a certain point in life to abandon you and make you figure out the rest on your own. No. Most of the time that we find ourselves stressed and worried about the future is because we have taken things off of God's plate and put them on our own when we are not capable of handling it. I have been so incredibly stressed and anxious the last few weeks and I realized it is because I am trying to clutch the future with white knuckles and guide it the way I want it to go. I have spent days journaling just outlining what I wanted in life and wracking my brain as to how I can achieve it all. How can I be 100% at work, at my business and as a wife and someday as a mother? How can I do it all? How can I manage everything? How can I keep what I want and get rid of what I don't want? How can we make it financially? How can I manage all of the risk? I, I, I, I, I is the common denominator in these questions. I let it go this week. I could not physically or emotionally handle trying to deal with everything, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. And it is absolutely incredible how much peace I have now after giving my problems to God when not a thing has changed about my situation. It is amazing how confident and sure of the future I feel when I still don't know more than I knew last week. But God has been teaching me a lesson in confidence. God has really clearly met me and showed me this week that he has brought me to this place in my life for a very specific reason. He has given me hope that all of my dreams will be fulfilled in His perfect way and that I need to continue to work hard to the best of my abilities for right now.
This peace is available to those who are willing to let go and give their futures to God. The closer you get to Him the more confident you feel. It is truly amazing and a piece of wisdom I couldn't not share because I know many people who struggle with this.
Lastly more as just a funny comparison, here are some photos of confidence vs confidence in God. They really give a great visual illustration for this discussion.
Confident -
Confident in God -
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
New Years Celebrations
We had a wonderful New Years this year! Chris and I hosted the New Years Eve celebration and my grandparents hosted the New Years Day celebration.
I got our of my comfort zone on NYE and made my first lasagnas and Dutch apple pies! I also made fettucine alfredo, salad and bread. We spent the evening playing games and watching the New Years performances in New York and LA. It was a great night!
I got our of my comfort zone on NYE and made my first lasagnas and Dutch apple pies! I also made fettucine alfredo, salad and bread. We spent the evening playing games and watching the New Years performances in New York and LA. It was a great night!
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